Bear’s Home Birth Story
Utterly other worldly wonder
I had spent the week rushing around after finishing work and feeling like I had nothing organised for the baby. On Friday afternoon after a day with my high energy three year old son at 36.6 weeks pregnant I went into labour.
Around 6.30pm I handed over childcare duties to Chris my husband and because we had friends coming for dinner I thought I’d have a rest. I lay on the bed and started to feel rythmic contractions. I still wasn’t convinced he was coming. Chris came and checked in on me and I showed him the timings, he looked shocked ! Three weeks and one day early just felt like it could be a false alarm, we cancelled supper with our friends all the same and Chris made contact with our doulas Romy & Jimena and Abby, our midwife from the Homerton Homebirth team. Abby and Laura arrived at around 9pm with all their gear, we lit a fire and I put on four weddings and a funeral and lay on the sofa. Even though it was quite clear to everyone else at this point that I was in the early stages of labour I needed confirmation. Abby examined me and said I was 4cm the baby was coming tonight !
I lay on the sofa for a while longer and the contractions started to slow a little so I sat and moved between kneeling and leaning on the birthing ball.
Jimena and Romy arrived. Some time passed and I suddenly felt like I wanted to be upstairs in our bedroom. The contractions were strong and it felt like I should rush between them to get up the stairs, I made it to the top and had another contraction. Chris ran me a bath but I didn’t feel like lying down or being submerged in the water so I got into the shower and had the hot water on my back. After this Jimena put the tens machine on my back and it started to help ease the pain of the contractions and almost coach me through them, I wanted to be in the bedroom so we moved from the bathroom and the contractions got closer together.
Jimena and Romy working with me though my contractions, I felt so held. I was kneeling on the floor and had my head on the side of the bed and I could feel his head pushing, I felt like when I closed my eyes I could see his head in my pelvis and I suddenly felt the inescapable feeling of no return, I don’t know if I said it out loud but I couldn’t see how he was going to fit through that space; deep trust in everyone around me and being so held by everyone made me let go of the fear and move beyond this. I remember Romy holding my hand, being right by my side. The power of being mothered and opening to everything that was happening in this moment was magical. I wanted to stand and I held on to Chris and felt the head decending, Chris really held me in this moment, the final few contractions felt so powerful and animal. His head arrived and I put my hand down to hold it before the next contraction came, we had nearly made it, I felt like we were working together and I was talking to him.
As the next contraction came with a gentle push he arrived. Wrapped up in my arms and coughing then crying. Utterly other worldly wonder. 1.30am. We lay on the bed while he was checked over on my body, everyone was so gentle with him and me.
After a while we talked about the placenta coming, I wanted to avoid the injection if possible but was open to it. Jimena gave me some herbs to support the birth of my placenta, we waited a while longer and then I moved to the loo and Chris and I sat with baby Bear on me wrapped in towels until finally the placenta arrived naturally.
Everything was cleaned and I had a warm shower, we got into bed and the wonderful circle of women who had been there with us all said goodbyes. We slept for a few hours before the sun arrived and Otis, our eldest son, came upstairs in the morning to meet his baby brother Bear.
“Another wonderful shared care experience with my good friend and sister birthkeeper Romy Finbow.”
